Monday, May 27, 2013

Skank Summer

So, last summer lets just say, I wasn't a perfect little girl. I mean I didn't do anything, but I did start hanging out with Team Slut and their sluttiness rubbed off on me... literally. I just acted like a slut and texted people like I was a slut. I sent pictures to guys that didn't even like me. I regret everything that happened. I made out with one person from Team Slut, more than once, and she was a girl. Oh my lord, me writing this makes me feel yuckie! I didn't even kiss a guy tho. I saw more than one guy jack off.. but never actually saw the D. So if any of my reader are like team slut, lets make a vow.
I, Past Slut, promise to leave all my sluttiness behind and not let that get in the way of living my life.  I vow not to be a slut with anyone, unless we are together and committed. Then I will be a slut for him/her. I vow not to make out with girls and let guys choke the chicken while doing it. I vow not to send pictures in my A cup bra saying "Have fun;)' because, lets face it, they will obviously show their friends. (Most of the guys in my grade have seen me in a bra.. FML) Finally, I vow not to be, act, or think about being a slut. That was a phase and I'm over it. Amen....
That's it for today, that was my past, lets live in the present and hope for the future!! EMOTIONAL QUOTE!!! XOXO ME

Thursday, May 9, 2013

The Giraffe Squirts at Dawn

When McSteamy and I were "together" for those two months, we were REALLY dirty. It's like we couldn't talk normally.  Looking back at our texts was bad, my cheeks get bright red because of how embarrassing they were. So, of course, my friends found the worst of it. FML. It wasn't like: I like you so much. It was:
Me: I'm getting in the shower...brb

McSteamy: Why don't I come in with you?

Me: Hmmm.. I don't think that's such a good idea.

McSteamy: But it's eco-friendly!

Me: Oh when you put it that way.. Hahah. LOL
McSteamy: Come on babe, let me come over!

Me: Sorry, Can't. Maybe next week.

McSteamy: We can watch a movie. But I don't think we'll watch the entire thing.

Me: Why not?

McSteamy: We Will be doing something else.

Me: I hope it involves both of us kissing each other.;)

McSteamy: Ohh.. It will;)

(By the way, these weren't as bad as the ones we have at night, over snapchat)

So that's about how most of our conversations went on. Hot.. Right? Where does The Giraffe Squirts at Dawn come in you ask? Well, after Lola and Lucy (My other BFF) harassed me and laughed at me for awhile, they came up with a code name for it. Giraffe  because McSteamy is tall. Squirts: because it was wet;). And Dawn, because this went down at about 3 in the morning.

After McSteamy and I broke up, Lola always harasses him in Math. It's funny because I don't care and McSteamy FREAKS every time we mention those dreadful word... The Giraffe Squirts at Dawn.
So, that's that inapropro story. XOXO ME

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

What Is She Doing... The Final Chapter

Definition of Back-Stabbing-Bitch: CECILIA.
 I can say this since I don't feel bad for her anymore. After she did this final thing to me, I snapped. It started in early February where we bring in a new character into the situation, McSteamy. Cecilia and I were on talking terms. And I had the hottest little boy toy, McSteamy. Let me tell you, he was so hot. His abs, his eyes, his hair, his muscles  and his calves #turnon! And he thought I was perfect, we were getting serious, so he was going to ask me out any day. Honestly, he was the only guy that I actually thought I loved, the feeling I got with him was... amazing. Here comes a poem: My heart fluttered, my hands sweat when ever I was with him. I loved hime. LOVED! No need to applaud at my awful poem skills, it's ok.

Anyway, it started going downhill while I was in florida for Spring Break 2k13. So, to my understanding, McSteamy was getting a bit steamy with two other people. I heard from my friend Lola right when I got back. McSteamy was "hooking up" with my ex-best friend Stacy. Stacy is kind of emotionally unstable and a slut. Then, I heard the other person was.. Cecilia. Perf!! I went up to McSteamy and talked things through with him and we were ok, or so I thought.
Then the dreadful Monday the 17th came around and all hell broke loose. McSteamy asked out Cecilia, while I thought we had a thing, still. Then later that night he told me things were done between us. I was absolutely heart-broken. I didn't know what I did, until I came to school on Tuesday.

Oh My Lord, was Tuesday interesting. I felt like I was in Jersey Shore- Middle School Edition, I was told Cecilia and McSteamy were going out by seven different people in first periode. Damn I was pissed at McSteamy. But was I enraged at Cecilia! She new him and I had a thing, what a beeotch. So I went up to ask her (after I cried for a bit.. Shh, no one knows!) about McSteamy and say why she would do that. And of course she looks at me and says: "Ohhh, sorry Ellie, but McSteamy chose me. Awe poor baby wants him? Too bad, he mine. So don't ever talk to him or I will hurt you physically and emotionally." I had enough, I did what any red-blooded american would do. I TP-ed and egged her house! Then, after she found out it was me, she smacks me in the boob?!?!? WTF? Damn. Was my boob bruised, but I was super proud at the fact that I barely flinched (One point for Me!)

That was about 4 weeks ago. So that brings us to present time, today, where I still hate her (so much) and she hates me. Luckily my bruise healed quickly. Her and McSteamy are going 4 weeks Strong and I am pissed at both of them. I will never forgive Cecilia, but whatever, she's a bitch. I guess thats all for now. XOXO ME

What is She Doing Part II

7th grade went by in a blur and 8th grade came right up behind me. Summer, lets just say, wasn't my best months ever. I was kind of a slut. That's a different story. Anyway, in the final week of summer, I was on my friend, Stacy's, Facebook. Cecilia was on facebook and I decided to play a ridiculous prank on her. I told her that Lola and I were pregnant. [The story was: I was stoned and drunk at a party and some guy from another school took us in the woods a got both of us pregnant.] I honestly thought she would think it was a joke! But, she didn't. What an idiot. Then she called all of her friends and cried. (one point for me).

After that "dramatic" thing Cecilia didn't really talk to me. Well, we had a couple bitch- texts, but we didn't talk in person. Anyway, after that ordeal, she went on and off liking people, then she had a (as us 8th graders like to call them) thing with a freshman, then they started going out. That relationship was hilarious! First, this "guy" was an ugly person, like Sloth (from the Goonies) and A Raccoon had babies. Ugly. After This guy, Ted, we talked and he told me purty funny things about their relationship... Like: Cecilia took off her shirt and showed her boobs,  and he said she has HUGE pepperoni nipples, We're talking around slices of bologna status. And plus she has NO boobs, well neither do I, but I don't randomly show guys my boobs (and I don't have pep nips). He also said that she always came up behind him and gave him a open mouth kiss with a lot of tongue. He described it like getting a kiss from a dog, but in the back of your throat. Yuck? 

So... I guess she found out about me talking, just talking (over facebook) to him and she FLIPPED. This was after they broke up, like a 3 weeks after. During lunch, she came up to me and this is our convo: 
Her: I don't want you talking to Ted. 
Me: You're not dating.
Her: But still, don't
Me: But still, you're not dating, so it's kinda a free country.
Her: Just stop. You don't have the right to talk to him. Is he flirting with you?
Me: No!
Her: Well, What have you guys been doing? 
Me: Snapchating and texting. 
*She runs to the bathroom crying, WTF?*
Her: Ellie, stop talking to him
Me: Nah, but thanks for asking nicely. 
Her: Ellie, stop causing drama, because I hate it. 
Me: Me. Causing. DRAMA? Cecilia, you're the one that came up to me, ran to the bathroom, cried, and came back to me. 

Yup, that's about how that conversation went. Ridiculous. That caused drama for a while. But thats not the end of that. After that, Ted told me that Cecilia in boxed him and they had an entire conversation and she said that I looked like a mouse and I wasn't as cool as her because she was a '98 baby and I was a '99 baby. Ohhhh, she got me (one point for Cecilia.. Just kissing) Then, in school the next day I went up to her when I saw her in the bathroom and I said: "Hey Cecilia, do I look a little mousey today.. Oh wait it's just because I'm not as cool as you '98 babies.. Sorry" Yea, I can be mean, I wasn't that mean, just making fun of her. Damn. I love her. That's that story. More later, XOXO ME 

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

What is She Doing? Part I

The start to Cecilia and my pretty rocky relationship is way back in 6th grade...

After I broke up with my boyfriend, I was so mad at him, I decided to take it out on his math book. My friend and I found it and DESTROYED it. We, honestly, couldn't of made it any worse. We lit it on fire, had a car run over it a couple time, we wrote in it, ripped it, stabbed it, and even stained it with food coloring. I mean afterwards, I didn't even know it was a math book. Yes, I felt bad, but it doesn't mean that Cecilia had to threaten to tell my Vice Principal. She wasn't even a part of it, but like usual, she decided to stick her nose right where it didn't belong. She told me to pay back and I respectfully declined the offer, then she said, "If you dont give him that money, I will and I promise, tell Mr. B." After that I was scared shitless, I was in 6th grade and Mr. B was scary! So I gathered up coins and dollars to get $50 to pay for that stupid book. After that incident, I never forgave Cecilia.

Then, the summer going into 7th grade was super rough, I was very depressed because all of my friends abandoned me because Cecilia told them too. The worst part was is that my parents didn't notice, thats what made it worse. I was very suicidal and started cutting myself, not the best time of my life. I was getting call horrible names for a little 11 year old. I couldn't take it anymore, I thought everyone hated me, I didn't hang out with one person that summer. Every night I cried myself to sleep. But, I realized I was sooo over reacting. I called my friend at the last day of summer and we actually hung out. I got out of my funk and went into 7th grade with a smile on my face. 

7th Grade: Cecilia got pushed down as Queen Bee and my friend, Lola, was at the top now. 7th grade was my favorite grade, I wasn't involved in too much drama and I had friends I could trust at the time. Cecilia, on the other hand, had a really bad 7th grade. She told me, while we were having another bitch fight over text about her problems a week ago. She said she was called whore, fat, slut, bitch, ect... She said she was suicidal and depressed for the entire 7th grade, I almost felt bad for her then I read: " It was all your fault, your honestly the biggest bitch that ever lived. You ruined my life". I was super confused about that because all I ever did was tell people about what she did to me about the Math book. I didn't bitch her out or anything. But also, shes Cecilia, she just wanted to be on top again....  XOXO ME

To Be continued.

Life of Me

Living as one person in a 300 person class is intimidating. Plus, I am not (usually) a part of any of the drama. I have my own drama to deal with. Why worry about other peoples crap? I am class of 2017, standing tall, kind of. I'm only 5',  I think I'm the shortest person in my grade, (8th Grade). I love my grade, but sometimes I feel like the main character in a horrible soap opera. Wandering the hallways getting looked at after some dramatic event is awful! But laughing at the drama other people cause is super funny too. There are ups and downs of Middle school. Lately, I feel like I always have downs, but its starting to go back up.

This one girl in my grade has the center of attention 24/7 and its hilarious unless it deals with you. This girl, out of all 300 people in my grade, I hate the most. She's so arrogent, selfish, and annoying. There's someone like that in every grade though. She is awful to people she is around and not around. I mean, I've done my share of "bad" things to her, like: telling her I was pregnant. AS A JOKE (when I was in 7th grade) and she actually believed me and after I said I was kidding, she proceeded to cry and call everyone in her phonebook, like WTF? Everyone thought it was funny that she believed me, so I guess (if we're keeping score) I win that round. But more come about her. So (for the sake of everyones privacy) we will call her, Cecilia. XOXO ME